Comparing Your Success to Spouse
Success happens to everyone who works hard for it at different rates. You can have two people shoot for the same goals but their work ethic, personality, and other responsibilities can determine when each person will receive their success. Because everyone works for their success differently it’s not fair to compare your success to someone else’s. We most likely don’t know what they had to do to reach their level. Understandably, your spouse and you share a lot of time and life together. Yet that doesn’t mean that you and your spouse should compare each other’s successes. As much as you are each one, you are two different people. Don’t compare your success to your spouse.
You’re a team- don’t compare yourself to your spouse
When your partner wins, you win.
By that, I mean that any achievement either of you has is an achievement for both of you. Any person they meet and network with is another opportunity for you to not only meet the same people but learn from them. Instead of looking at what they have done and comparing your results to theirs why not encourage them to keep going instead?
It’s always better to give your spouse applause than to let jealousy and comparison enter your relationship. Before you say anything you’ll regret, control your mind and let out positive vibes. When you compare yourself to your spouse you can get feelings of inferiority.
Your story is different than your spouse’s
If your partner is more successful than you, in your eyes, you may feel as if you have gotten the short end of the stick.
Keep in mind that you can’t compare your success to your spouse. You are 2 different people and there are way too many variables as to why your partner is more ‘successful’ than you. Anyone who works and hones their craft will always receive recognition and awards for their practice. Depending on trends and your environment certain crafts may peak first than others. Like I stated earlier, success happens at a different pace for everyone.
I’ll share an example out of my personal life where my husband wants to be an entertainer. I want to run a non-profit in the future. I have set the groundwork for my business and I chose to begin with blogging as a means for my audience to get to know me and my purpose on a personal level.
My husband attends auditions, rehearsals, and different entertainment events to showcase and show off his dance, and acting talent. My goal is to not only share myself but create a large business and hire many people to work alongside my mission. Our stories will be different because we have different ideas and aims. Comparing my success to my spouse or their success to mine wouldn’t be logical. We simply are in different fields.
Why We Compare Our Success to Our Spouse
Although our goals are similar, we have goals in different fields. I can see myself attending government and professional events while my husband makes appearances to advertise movies and television shows. Currently, my husband creates more income than me and I can find myself feeling as if I’m not doing enough.
When I compare myself to my spouse it’s usually about finances, the people he’s met, and his social media accounts. Those numbers simply make me feel like I’m not doing enough. While these factors are visible to me every day I also can see the hard work he puts into his craft. He deserves any and every accolade he receives. But what I feel isn’t always what is true. I’m working just as hard but my success story will be different than his.
It’s okay to compare your success to other people and to learn from them. This includes your spouse. What is not okay is comparing your success to other people and then letting it get you down. This is one of my biggest challenges because sometimes I can feel as if I won’t be able to stand next to my husband and feel like I’m just as successful.
In reality, my time will come and his wins are my wins.
Be proud of your success and don’t compare your success to your spouse
This may be a selfish thing but I want my husband to be proud of the woman he’s married to. This makes sense to me, in other words, it’s as if I want to be known more than just being my husband’s wife but as someone who worked just as hard as him and was successful in my own thing.
The great thing about my husband is that he believes that I will be larger and more successful than he will ever be. That’s so encouraging to hear that from him. I’m glad that I can let out my feelings to him and feel great afterward. I hope that if at this point in your relationship that if you don’t feel like you can do this with your spouse yet that this article relieves you from feeling crazy and helps you feel more human.
In whatever you decide to do, keep doing it- you’ll always be rewarded for your hard work!
Your story is your own. For another outlook on comparison, check out this link.
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