If you take advantage of someone else’s money or time you are not that person’s friend. You don’t care if it’s your mom or dad, boyfriend, girlfriend, brother or sister, and/or best friend. You use people and use their money and possessions for themselves.
This may not describe you but it could be describing one of your friends. You may not even realize that this person is taking advantage of you. You may have even let it go so far that they’re now your partner or spouse.
If this is the case there are always ways to help your partner and spouse become a better person if they want to be. But, we got to know the characteristics of someone who takes advantage of you before assuming the person you’re dealing with is truly doing these bad things towards you.
There are four traits that determine if you are someone who takes advantage of people or if you’re living with someone right now who takes advantage of you.
Lazy With No Job
People who take advantage of others have no income. They have no money and usually have nothing of value that they’ve purchased themselves. Everything of theirs is borrowed or given to them by someone else. They have no job, no money and have absolutely no intention of getting a job. There’s always a reason and excuse to why they can’t have a job or get one.
Either they don’t have a car, they don’t have money for public transportation, their kids take up too much time and won’t let them progress, whatever the reason may be there’s always an excuse for them not to advance and if you’ve been friends with them long enough- you’ve heard it all.
If you have fallen for the sly words of this person it may be too late and you may have given that friend a place to stay, money, or your car.
Nowhere to Live
Another sign you have a friend that takes advantage of you is that they simply live with you already. They’ve taken over your house and you can’t get them t leave. This may not have been planned to be a permanent thing on your end but to them this is gold.
They gave you the sob story that they can’t move back in with their parents because their parents were the ones who kicked them out. They were homeless and had no one else to go to or whatever the reason may be, your accepting heart took their story as truth and let them enter into your home. Anyone would take the offer of living somewhere for free, but some people completely take advantage of that.
The first week of having a friend living with you may be great, and the second week you may begin to change your mind about having someone stay at your house too long. You’ll most definitely change your mind once your shampoo goes missing, your dishes are dirty, and your house it eventually becomes a mess.
These are the habits of someone who doesn’t respect your home and doesn’t care about what you did for them.
Crazy Life Story
When you met them they seemed normal until they suddenly told you about their life story which so happens to be a very crazy and (untrue) sad timeline of events that happened to your friend. The world was against them and so that is why they are where they are. They’ll even have you believe that you saved them from their miserable life.
Truth be told, you are in charge of your own life. No matter what people have done to you or who is against you, you are in control of what goes in your own life. No one else can control your life outcome and what happens to you but you.
As much as you may want to help someone they must help themselves. Someone who doesn’t want to help themselves must come up with a way to get someone else to help them. They will have most likely weaved a web of lies with many people and you’re the next one on the list that can help them.
You can help them but you can’t save them. Remember that.
They are a Master of Coming up With Excuses
The most obvious trait that this friend has is the trait of making excuses. They make excuses as to why they can’t cook or clean or help out with errands. There’s an excuse to why they can’t get a car or their license or why they can’t travel to their interview or why they can’t to make it to work on time. There’s always an excuse for why they cannot do something.
You can give them a number to call, set up an interview, give them start-up money but there’s always a reason as to why they can’t implement themselves and get themselves out of their rut.
By now you may have come to terms that your friend may actually be taking advantage of you. You are also giving into their plots and plans enables them to keep on doing what they do to you and to whoever else comes by their way in the future.
This kind of person you want to push to do things for themselves. This is the only way to help them. You want to loosen the strings little by little every day.
Bring yourself peace by helping them in a way that others who have crossed their paths haven’t been able to. Let them do more on their own and gain their independence without having them become a burden for you.
Yessenia is a compelling and innovative program and operations manager who uses her 5+ years of experience in operations management and graphic design to determine small business needs in the areas of inventory costs, labor expenses, P&L, COGs, marketing, and graphic design to create and manage profitable plans for small businesses and individual projects. She is the Owner and Founder of Tru.Works.
I know a bum!