True Story Early Marriage
Why did you get married so young?
We got married young. As a young married couple, my husband and I constantly shock people because they wonder how is it that we found each other so early in life? Let alone marry each other.
Every time I reflect upon that question I try to come up with an answer and it’s hard for me to believe that I even had such a negative view of marriage when I was younger.
I never wanted to get married. I believed that of myself in high school. Marriage didn’t seem to work. Most likely that belief stemmed from my parent’s divorce. I absolutely never wanted to admit that but I now know that it was.
Yet even though I once believed that marriage was not an option for me- at the age of 21 my boyfriend proposed to me and I accepted his proposal. Six months later I got married, and I’m writing this five years into my marriage and I don’t regret it.
So to answer the first question, the man I married was marriage material and I knew that if I didn’t marry him I would never find another man like that for another few years.
You didn’t have fun when you were young. Don’t you regret it?
This is another question I get A LOT! I absolutely don’t regret marrying at a young age. All my memories are with the man that I love. I have absolutely no one-night stand memories or vacations with friends that I may not be friends with later. All of my memories and first-time experiences are with my partner.
For example, my first trip to Florida and Disney World was with my partner. My first apartment was with my partner. College and even my first job memories are all shared with my spouse.
The best part of it all is that the time after I became an adult was spent learning how to become an adult was with my partner. We learned how to ‘adult’ together. We’ve been together now a total of 9 years and we just know each other so much now that today at 27 I feel like I have someone that understands me so well, it’s an understanding that only happens with time.
Dancing, drinking (responsibly) and trying new things absolutely happen but with my best friend.
How did you know he was the one?
First and foremost, this question always has me believe that the person asking me believes love is a fairytale. That’s the wrong mentality to have, especially when it comes to marriage.
True love, love at first sight, and all those other fantasies I personally don’t believe in. Love, at first sight, is usually lust, and true love, or otherwise known as ‘ the one’ doesn’t exist. You can enter multiple relationships and make any person the one if you both really wanted to.
When I met my partner, I didn’t like him. I didn’t like him at all. He knew that. It wasn’t until after a year into our friendship where I decided that I’d give him a chance to be with me like, who am I to think that?
I gave him that chance because at the age of 14 he had a job, at 16 he got his license. He saved money and respected me. He listened to me even while I was dating other dudes. No matter what I did, he was always my friend.
Those actions, after one year, were enough for me to think that this kid was indeed marriage material and that I shouldn’t just throw our relationship away. That’s why I chose to give him a chance. Even though I didn’t feel much for him except that he was a rare find.
Usually, this answer I give most people throws them off but I’m telling you I’m not the only one. Check out this other story by Mary Kate on her blog The Little Duckwife, where she explains exactly the same thoughts as me.
How did you guys last so long?
My favorite question is this one.
How did you guys last so long?
The answer to that question is simple. We both have the mentality that we don’t throw away relationships just because of a few disagreements or difficult moments. Even while we were dating we took every day as it came. Breaking up was not an option.
I held my partner and me to that standard. My standard was high. If you wanted me deeply, you had to be with me permanently.
I truly think that’s why my husband married me.
He knew I was a very serious girl. I changed my mind about marriage and I knew I was marriage material. The person I dated needed to be someone that believed I was marriage material also.
I never gave myself up completely to anyone. None of my past boyfriends knew who I truly was.
And if anyone wanted me, my complete self, they needed to want to be with me until death. I wasn’t giving myself up to a fling, or someone I just met. They had to earn me, and I wanted to earn them.
Early marriage in conclusion
To end this, my early marriage seems like a fairy tale to most people. When I explain my marriage to people not many understand it. Some respect it, and others still believe I’m crazy and was immature when I got married and I’ll regret it later, and yadda, yadda.
But I hope how I write you can see that I truly made a smart and mature decision very early. It just so happens that I chose to take my chance early, and not throw away a great opportunity. We got married young. It can happen. It happens if you want it to and if the other person wants it to. Don’t knock off early marriage. It’s awesome. If you’re interested in some of the other true stories of early marriage feel free to try these posts: